Some Have Gone, and Some Remain (I've Loved Them All)

I'm really not good with goodbyes and in the next week I'm saying goodbye to my friend and neighbor, Emily. I like Erik and Eli, the men in her life, but she was one of my women friends and I think all my sisters out there know what I mean. I was even fortunate enough to have her living right next door. Isn't that what we all want? The kind of "sit-com" neighbor you could pop over and share a cup of coffee with? Even when wearing pajamas? I actually had that!

The problem is, Emily didn't want to be here. Not at all. She had her shiny new doctorate and was job-hunting at about the worst time in history to be doing that. She wound up taking a position at an extension campus of a state university that will go unnamed in case I ever decide to print any of the things she said about it. In a nutshell, it took her away from her beloved New England to a job she hated.

So it was with an ambivalent heart that I heard she'd been offerred a teaching position in New Hampshire. A job and a place she loves. I had to agree she should take it, and I'm happy for her. I really am.

Of course, I was terribly sad, too. We walked together, shared coffee, talked about everything. We did yoga together (arranged by her). I shared the joy when Erik and Emily started their family, and by their description I was Eli's "favorite neighbor." Eli and Brandon could hang out together (in a closely supervised way). There will be a lot to miss.

In the age of Facebook, however, I guess no one really goes away. A post is a post whether it's from next door or across the country. I'll get to see Eli grow up in snapshots. I'm happy for the family and friends that will be getting them back. Thanks for sharing!

That's one thing about life I'm not sure I'll ever get used to - the way people pop in and, especially, out, of my inner circle. Lately I've come to think of life as a slow-motion square dance: I have my group, I know the motions, then they call an Allemande Grand Right and Left and my partner moves on and I have to start all over. I'll have a close friend, then our trajectories change and we've moved on. Kaya also needed to get out of Ohio, she was a California girl. Chantay was part of the social work world. Wendi and Nadine were the law office. So was Mary, and I practically lived at her house for awhile! Kim was my support when I was leaving the work world, but she was homeschooling and I was not. I knew there would be trouble when Marla had her fifth child, she's almost too busy for friends!

I still have friends, and gaps fill in, eventually. Goodbye, Emily, I will miss you.

My Christmas card list just got one name longer.